miyaviaoilove

i forgot about my LJ -.-
FAIL.
it was cuz i was really depressed n emo but now im happy again i got my boyfriend in my life again and im soooo happy
^___^

i dont get how i get so popular on websites O.o and people <3 me ALOT n i make alot of online friends...
but but..
in real life...
i dont have friends.
seriously i dont.
i cant call anyone to hang out with  me or go watch a movie.
only my older sis and lil sis those are my two friends. and i dont care what u think. my sisters are <3
i just dont get y people dont like me...
.in high school everyone hated me because i was sooo shy and quite and they thought i was concieted or something. that made me cry all the time. i was just shy and its hard for me to open up to people because i dont trust people....since 5th grade i was bullied up until 12 grade (got a half day schedule so i didnt have to see anyone).....it makes me pretty sad sometimes that im a loner n got no friends but i really dont care.
my sisters keep me company.....and my bf also <3
eh im okay with being a loner

D:
i mean really hard..i was suppose to see my boyfriend this weekend but  i didnt cuz hes dumbazz lost 20,000$ in gambling since he loves casinos and shizz....and he was trying to do everything possible to come see me but he couldnt since hes broke -.-
seriously how do u loose 20,000? in gambling aish.
i was trying so hard not to be sad this weekend but last night i just broke down....i just miss him sooo much...i couldnt stop crying.....but hearing his voice made me feel better....he always makes me smile ^____^
wth do u have to be three hrs eh oppa?
i cant wait to see you though hopefully this weekend coming up or the next one.
btw my bf lives in new york and i live in maryland
this sucks -.-
im actually considereing moving to new york.....we agreed to talk about when we see each other again. =D
it was just a hardweekend without him.....
i miss u baby.

finally after two years of notes texting back n forth...i finally met my papi..ahem my KOREAN papi. He is sooo fuckin sexy hot dam *melts*
i was a lil nervous at first thought he wouldnt like me...but he loved me hehe
spent most of the weekend with him..in his hotel room ;)
i miss him so much...his kisses..his touch...that smell of smoke...how smooth his cheeks are...everything about him.
cant wait to see u again baby.
luv u.

i really wish my fave jrock bands like the gazette, alice nine, miyavi, gackt, vidoll, sug, everyone would come to the United States. I know some of them have come but mostly to california. I've missed my ONE chance to see dir en grey in maryland :( they were only 30 mins away but i couldn't go FML. biggest regret EVER. I also missed ayabie my yumehito AAHH! they played the same place as Diru. I can't believe i missed two of my fave bands. But i really want the big bands to come also like the gazette *O* if they ever decided to come to maryland or DC id be the first one in line SERIOUSLY. i will never miss my chance to see my aoi chan play the guitar and ruki as he sings beautifully. I just wait for the day when my idols Miyavi and Gackt come. OMG that would make my year i would def try to meet them backstage i cant m iss a chance to meet my idols..the ones i look up2 for guidance. (sigh) i cant wait for that day. Until than i will enjoy the videos and mp3s.

Hello everyone i just recently joined and i hate figureing things out lol for the first time it suxs! but  yea im into GAZETTE yesss i love dem especially aoi, alice nine, girugamesh, dir en grey, high and mighty color, jrock DBSK EEEEEHHH jaejoong!!!! love dem